The One With The Fire And The Princess Dress.

By Alison June 23, 2006 22 Comments 3 Min Read

Grate

It was a beautiful, rainy grey morning in the middle of June when  she  decided it would be an awfully good plan to do as she did  in  the depths of Winter, and eat breakfast by candlelight.
So she flitted around the living  room lighting  far too many little candles and a hundred  little tealights, popped a  delighted babba into his highchair and wandered into the kitchen  in an  "all’s  right with the world" kind of fashion…

Breakfast was going to be an  elaborate affair for your average Thursday morning, but what the hell hey? If you can’t celebrate nature watering your garden for you, what the heck can you celebrate? So she juiced strawberries and scrambled eggs, toasted bagels and peeled the most perfect blush pink apple before going to town on creating a  scrumptiously pretty breakfast tray fit for the Queen she was…

"Mummy" said her little angel, "Isn’t the fire pretty?"

And the Mummy smiled and gave herself a small pat on the back, because the fireplace was abundant with hydrangeas from the garden, sweet little lavender candles and an oh so pretty postcard she had found at the car boot sale the week before.

"Yes Darling, it is beautiful" she said.

"So pretty and orange" said her little cherub.

What a clever little boy I have, she thought as she filled the sink with a  pool full  of violet and basil scented  water. And then she stopped dead in her tracks. So pretty and orange?? This house was pink and green and red, but there wasn’t a square inch of orange anywhere other than in the toybox she kept well out of  sight of her delicate  senses. Orange? Fire?

FIRE!!

She ran into the living room and there sat her little boy munching on a slice of banana, utterly transfixed by the glorious fire ablaze on the mantlepiece above his head.
The Mummy nearly fainted. This called for a sexy fireman and quite frankly there wasn’t one to be seen for miles around.

She ran back into the kitchen and threw her bestest vintage tea-towel into the violet and basil water, then ran back to the fire and threw it over the little pink tealight that was the cause of all the trouble. The fire blazed. Her vintage tea towel steamed. The gorgeous postcard burst into flames and her little boy laughed to see such fun on an otherwise dull morning.

Out she dragged a gorgeous cotton tray cloth, drowned it, and ran back to chuck it over the fire before it set her little boys curls alight, and when it turned black and the room was no longer aglow, she collapsed into a heap on the floor and thought about never getting up again.

But as if Mummys would ever have the luxury of lying comatose on a Laura Ashley rug to recover from such a fright!  The little boy had to be dragged to nursery or it would be clear to the Yummy Mummys of Ormskirk that she wasn’t coping at all with the sheer hassle of having been abandoned…

So she shoved  him into a pair of shorts quite unsuitable for puddles of muddy rain, packed his bag with goodness knows what, force fed him another piece of morello cherry jammy toast, shoved her feet into a pair of black Birkenstocks and dragged herself and her astonished little boy out of the door…

"Mummy"  said he, "Are you wearing your princess dress to school today? ."

The Mummy looked down and there she was. In all her broderie anglaise pink nightie glory. In the street.

A princess if ever there was one.

22 Comments

  1. mandy says:

    I've had a couple of similar experiences with the dresser catching on fire because of candles and tea-lights LOL!!!
    glad you are both o.k. though.

  2. marcella says:

    Hysterical!! Children say the darndest things don't they?

  3. diana says:

    so funny… so real… so well written… thank you !

  4. Wendy says:

    I can just imagine you! How funny, I thought disasters like that only happen to muppets like me!

  5. Sarah says:

    Oh bless you Queen! I've got to work with my slippers on before (via the 82 bus to be precise) Don't worry about it, there is a trend in Liverpool at the moment for people to go in to town in their pyjamas…. I say go with the flow and wear a different nightie every Thursday from now on!

  6. laney says:

    ~~~ thank the Lord for small boys~~~wet tea towels ~~~ and good writers~~~

  7. Meredith says:

    Oh that's classic! Glad you are all alright. Finley is so precious, and he serves as a trusty fire alarm!!

  8. karlanee says:

    I'm nearly crying here from laughter! I can just see this sight so clearly and it sounds like my kind of day! I'm so thankful you can find humor in writing all of it rather than staying down in the heap on the Laura Ashley rug! Delightful, Princess!

  9. melissa says:

    And he was so calm through the whole thing. Sounds like he's coping mighty well! As you are! 🙂

  10. Gena King says:

    what a morning! but I am enchanted by the idea of breakfast by candlelight,and intrigued by the violet and basil scented water? explain dear Housekeeper.xx

  11. Cookie says:

    You are so scrumptious dear Princess Alison….and so is Master Finley…..what a pair you make !!!! Hugsssss

  12. Ali says:

    I can't wait to you publish all of your delightful tales in one book. I'll be the first one to buy it! You're are such a gifted writer.

  13. Savannah says:

    Well, you didn't want an ORDINARY Thursday morning, did you? Oh, honey. I'm glad no disaster happened. Princess dress indeed… Glad Finley was such a vivid descriptor so you caught the "pretty" thing in time. Sorry about your pretty cloths, but it wouldn't have done to wait for the sexy firemen. DRATS! Happy Friday, sweetie. There's always the weekend. Love, G.

  14. Mindy says:

    Oh no….What a delightful little man Finley is…so glad it wasn't worse…very thankful that you and Finley are alright! Hugs Alison!

  15. Oh this is priceless! And you told the story so beautifully! Bless you, Alison – better days ahead. You're on the right track – keep being good to yourself; you deserve it!

  16. Kim says:

    Oh my gosh, you've given me quite a giggle!!! AND, weren't those other yummy mummies impressed that you not only got him to the nursery (dont need to tell them about the princess dress, but of course), but that you saved your home & child from fire on the way there!!!! 🙂

  17. Kim says:

    PS-I agree with the other posters that Finley has such a wonderful way of saying things–I think that there may be another talented writer in the family????

  18. donna says:

    What a fabulous tale. So glad you were both ok tho, phew!
    Just popped over to see what delicious musings you have for me and what a surprise I got to see my French Fabric on your ebay wish list! Thank you for that, you are a sweetie 🙂

  19. oh my goodness
    This is my first visit here
    and I am delighted thru and thru with each entry
    Thank you for such wonderful writing
    Love – S .
    ps. I am coming back for more !

  20. Kether says:

    Oh Alison….
    But at least you looked like a princess, eh?

  21. Suzie says:

    Alison, I don't know how you do it! You have the most delightful gift of turning a potential disaster into the sweetest story ever!
    I'm glad you and Fin are all good and you managed to pick yourself up from the Laura Ashley rug and carry on 🙂
    Much love to you both xxx

  22. Sandi says:

    How frightening for you, but you coped so deliciously, and managed to still be a princess through it all. Good for you.
    Many years ago, I woke one early morning to my little one sitting calmly in his high chair holding his singed blanket, and watching the fire he had started by turning on the stove.

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