What the Devil Is She Doing Now?

By Alison November 8, 2023 10 Comments 5 Min Read

My Finn takes no prisoners and is prone to telling me exactly what’s what on matters verging from the way I leave glasses on my bedside table to the inappropriate way I recently denounced Netflix and in response he swung his head around exorcist style and told me “We don’t talk like that in this house“. Ooh err. Who made him Lord of the Boxset?

He is both my moral compass, keen to point out when I am being unreasonable, or unkind (he cannot tolerate unkindness, even to those who have done him deeply wrong) and a quick-cut route to clarity on all matters from my love life to the doings of Doctor Who. I adore him, but hells bells my boy-man is hard-line, and cuts me off mid-sentence to inform me, with little regard for my feelings, when I am guilty of kerfuffle, procrastination or plain old wrong thinking. With Finn around, a person finds herself in almost constant trouble and has to explain herself on a regular basis.

And so it was last week when I must have been huffing and puffing and humming and muttering until finally he asked me what was wrong as I was disturbing his You-Tube hopping by insisting on breathing in my own living room. So I told him. I told him about the integrated community that had no privacy options at BrocanteHome, and I said how all the forums were in different boxes and my usually chatty community had fallen silent and I was all of a fluster about it, and he looked not remotely interested but took my laptop and bit his lip and looked disappointed in me and finally said, “Where is the blog? If I want to talk about my account where do I go? Why is there two shops? How come I have to sign in here and then sign in again to view the Library?”

And on and on he went while I looked deep into my most excellent mug of tea and muttered I’m doing it, And he said, Mum, you are ALWAYS doing it, and today is the day to decide it needs to be DONE because you are permanently stressed and your Ladies (that is what he calls you) must be absolutely despairing! And I said Yes, and he said, and I quote, “sort it out – put the blog back front and centre and have ONE place for everything else”.

Readers, I thought about throwing the MOTHER of all strops, right there on the living room rug. How very dare he be RIGHT? But he’s a bit scary so I got on with it instead while he walked in a circle muttering for Gawd’s sake as he waited for the kettle to boil because he is a person with veins awash with tea and I blame the nurses in the children’s hospital who popped tea in a bottle to disguise the taste of lactulose when he was two and created a tea-drinking monster in the process.

Anyway, I digress. If he a web-savvy, generally-savvy sort cannot make head nor tail of it, then what hope was there for the rest of us? But wait, he wasn’t finished. He marched back in with Meep at his heels, (for like the rest of us, Meep thinks Finley is GOD), a teaspoon in his hand and a tea-towel over his bare naked shoulder and he said:

Right Mum, here’s what you have done. You have been stuffing a shop full of great things for almost twenty years and now you have taken it in to your head to turn a shop into an escape room. A puzzle with secret codes and mystery boxes and you have hid all the best stuff, and won’t tell them where it is unless they take the trouble to ask and Mum, no-one has got time!! And while I’m at it, why haven’t you written another book!!!”

And I sat and came up with a billion defences for my general mardiness, tardiness and all round ludicrosity and to my eternal shame chose attack as the best form of defence and retaliated in a way I am not proud of .

You eat too many sausages, Finn.

He stopped, mid- sentence, half way up the kitchen and then turned to issue the kind of withering, disappointed glare frankly designed to have hell freeze over, and said “and you make too many excuses“. Ouch.

We had reached an impasse. I looked at all the pretty I created and tried to see it through the eyes of those who didn’t live in my tangled head, and he finished the tea and brought it to me with a protein pudding by way of an apology for telling me the truth and he sat down beside me and leaned his head om my shoulder and said, “Just undo it Mum. Think back to when it worked best, and make it happen again, and say sorry. Say I messed up and then get on with doing what you do best! Write!

So yes. All this to say that I have indeed undone what I had created and the community is back in Circle, because that was the most successful of all forms of community because it is the most accessible and frankly the most fun, and if I don’t have to think of the mechanics of something I can call upon a support team to help with, I can indeed get on with popping the blog back where it should be and putting everything else into one really pretty container in Circle so you download the app and have the Brocante Library in the palm of your hand all over again.

So there we were. me and my boy.

“Mum, do I really eat too many sausages?”

Yeah“, I said, “but that’s ok. You are learning.

He nodded.

Finn, you don’t really think it’s mean to get cross with Netflix when I can’t find anything to watch, do you??”

Yeah“, he said. “I really do. They are doing their best. Going through a weird patch. We are all just doing our best, aren’t we? I eat too many sausages, Netflix are still catching up after the Pandemic, and you Mum, are simply off your chops.”

Thus ends the story of why I turned BrocanteHome upside down last week and rolled us all back to last year before my life went a little sad and I got in a muddle I couldn’t seem to unpick.

All will become clearer in the next few days, I promise.x


  1. Laura_Elsewhere says:

    Dear Finn,

    You are brilliant- I expect it’s due to all those sausages, so keep eating them!

    Love, Laura, one of The Ladies 🙂

    p.s. your mum is also brilliant, but should probably eat more sausages…

    1. Alison says:

      Ah Laura, you hold a special place in his heart after providing him with just the right words he needed to hear when he was dithering about his bar job, when I couldn’t help him make sense of what he needed to do to get past the anxiety.x

  2. Maria says:

    I woke up with a splitting headache and a workday ahead, and this was just what I needed: a few laughs and a reminder that we are all just doing our best. Thank you! 🙂

  3. Kelly says:

    Ahhhhh, we did grow wise children didn’t we?!
    Mine set my dithering mind straight when need be too! It is such a topsy turvy feeling to have THEM be the wisdom in our lives isn’t it?! I can’t help but adore them even more for it though!! 😂

    Cheers to another sausage Finn!! Thanks for loving your Mum!! 🌸

  4. Cindy says:

    Dear Finn,
    You are brilliant!

  5. Shelley Kay says:

    Dearest Alison
    Im sure it is an adventure when you implement an idea as wonderful as Brocante Home.
    I admire your fortitude and so appreciate the content in the library.
    May this next chapter be the best yet.

  6. Niki says:

    Ah, the wisdom of children. One Mother’s Day some years ago, my eldest announced that in exchange for her teen years, (she’s nearly 40) she would not only see to it that my technology is always up-to-date, but that I know how to use it. She has kept that promise which at times has certainly demanded as much patience of her as her teen years did of me!

  7. Annette Canales says:

    Finn: I admire your honesty and courage. You a re truly a blessing to you mom. Thank you for caring and looking out for her. We adore her and you need to know she is very special to us.

  8. Linda says:

    Thanks, Finn. I have enjoyed reading about you since you were 3 or 4, I think. Your mother is amazingly talented, as you know. I’m so glad you can help her with the tech side. Good luck and best wishes!

  9. Karla says:

    Aren’t we moms always a mix of proud and aghast when our children have pegged us right to the board with ourselves? Kudos to Finn for sorting it out and helping you find what worked again. I did love the Circle and I must say I am happy we are back there. Alison – I’m proud of you for raising a man who is so strong and confident yet gentle and kind as well. And thank you for listening to him and getting us back to rights.

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