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  1. Yes. My husband doesn't even enter some rooms and hasn't noticed half of what is in the house. I will say he has a penchant for pink and purple and so my floral-y displays don't upset him even when placed blatantly on the kitchen table…he had pink toilet paper and kleenex when we started dating.

  2. If you mean that men are the ones we continually clean up after, and complain to when they forever bring home boxes of "stuff" which we have to find homes for (ie "hide"), then yes, men ARE the guests! (And I have FOUR of them!)

  3. I think most of the time it's true…though things are changing. Women still generally run the house and decided on the decorating, etc. etc. Poor, poor men…
    Terri

  4. Shabbyinthecity mentioned her husband had pink toilet paper and kleenex when they first started dating and I'd say it was probably because it was cheaper! I think for the most part men are happy not to have to decide on the decorating side of things and often just want to make sure their television has a spot in there someplace.

  5. I think this is mostly true — but I also think it is a wise wife/mate who allows her other half to establish some sense of self. My guy has come home with new dishes, does all the grunt work — but admits he can't imagine the schemes I explain. He's willing to put down a good base coat and then let me do whatever I want on top of it.
    IMO, It's a case of trust (and most men trust us to take care of decorating and the like) — but also I believe it's important for us to understand that the house is their haven too and they shouldn't be a non-entity. Part of what is so important to me as the prime inside decision maker (the lawn, roof and gutters are his domain), is to create a "home" — a comforting and nurturing environment for my husband. That sounds sooo June Cleaverish…

  6. Yes. although my husband does complain and say it's his house as well now and again, but then he doesn't buy anything for it or putter or fiddle. Hell, some days he's not sure where a thing is! But that's only when I've been at work on it.

  7. Hmm. Yay AND nay. I am, without a doubt, the "author" of our home. However, I think that couples have personalities, as do individuals. So I don't have the home now I would have if I were single – our decor is my interpretation of our personality as a couple, as opposed to full-blown Jennicakesville.

  8. hmmm…the only thing i think of about my husband being a guest is i only WISH he felt that way…i'm not that great of a housekeeper or chef…but i do often think how nice it must be to come home to a hot meal nearly every night of the week, and have someone wash all your clothes and purchase everything you need without thinking about it…then again, i think how hard it must be for him to provide all the funding to do that…since i don't contribute financially. seems like the older we get and the longer we're married, the more he doesn't care how i "do the house" just as long as the kiddos are happy and so is he. : ) blessings dear allison, always enjoy stopping by!

  9. I think she hit it right on, because it certainly explains a lot of things – why (generally) men don't really CARE what decor we choose, as long as it's not too feminine in his room(s). That covers both statements Elsie made.
    I really like coming across this idea of men being "guests" because now, there's reason and direction when it comes to taking care of the home. How do you treat a guest? You want them to be comfortable. You don't insist they work, but you let them if they want to work. You serve them meals, keep their space clean, etc. I can see how seeing him as a guest would make sense.
    My husband keeps reminding me that he's the one working to pay for everything. (!) Well, a guest does pay for his keep, so that also takes the sting out of that statement from him. Working to please a guest is better than working for a tyrant. Seeing them as guests in our homes is far more pleasant.
    I certainly agree with the statement that the house reflects the wife's personality. Even if the lady can't afford her taste, that's not to say the house doesn't reflect her personality, because personality is the bare bones to which taste is attached. I think.

  10. I think she hit it right on, because it certainly explains a lot of things – why (generally) men don’t really CARE what decor we choose, as long as it’s not too feminine in his room(s). That covers both statements Elsie made.
    I really like coming across this idea of men being “guests” because now, there’s reason and direction when it comes to taking care of the home. How do you treat a guest? You want them to be comfortable. You don’t insist they work, but you let them if they want to work. You serve them meals, keep their space clean, etc. I can see how seeing him as a guest would make sense.
    My husband keeps reminding me that he’s the one working to pay for everything. (!) Well, a guest does pay for his keep, so that also takes the sting out of that statement from him. Working to please a guest is better than working for a tyrant. Seeing them as guests in our homes is far more pleasant.
    I certainly agree with the statement that the house reflects the wife’s personality. Even if the lady can’t afford her taste, that’s not to say the house doesn’t reflect her personality, because personality is the bare bones to which taste is attached. I think.

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