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  1. I hear you sister! It is nice, when you think you are all alone on your crazy (i.e overwhelmed,discouraged,emotional) boat, to read something like this and realize you are not. The boat is in fact teeming with many of us feeling remarkably the same! So I suppose we should be grateful for that small comfort 😉

  2. Oh Alison, this post tugged at my heart like no other. I have missed you, missed your blog how it felt to me, and am elated to find it back and to find you back. I remember these posts, infrequent, hitting us all where we too felt failure, ill-equipped to deal with expectations, losing the run of ourselves to what we thought we ought to do. Failing at creating a life from the inside out, instead of trying and chasing and hustling to create that life from the outside in, and wondering why it wasn’t working.
    Here this, sweet brave one. You have created a community. You have created a lasting legacy with your writing. And day to day you are creating a life for your family, a gorgeous, hectic, crazy, candle-filled, puttery treat guided life that soothes your soul and when your now big boy goes out into the world, he knows he has a safe haven to return to.
    I am realizing after multiple years of health issues – breast cancer, radiation, complications from radiation, a broken foot, a double mastectomy, complications from surgery, and now, once more, complications from radiation, that I have to build a new life from the inside out. And it is hard. It is the digging deep, find your passion, find your soul kind of hard. The answers are not outside ourselves, although I frequently wish I could just read Rosamunde Pilcher books and find myself transported into them, where fires are lighting and good food is made and the women are both glamorous and capable. But no, we have to start with baby steps. But the good news is that we get to change our minds, re-route, course-correct as much as we can. It cannot be done within the confines of a long weekend – although God I wish it would. It is a slow process, and we trip, and we put bandaids on the grazed area, and we get something right, and we keep going.
    You have been through so much, and your journey has never been straightforward. But please remember why you created this place of loveliness. I am forever grateful to you and your blog when I found myself in my thirties, married to an alcoholic, without a bean, and creating my own loveliness with whatever pennies I could scrape together.
    Know this, you are loved and beloved. And whatever happens, you do you. Because everyone else is taken.

    1. ..i completely get it..one year ago i became a widow again for the 2nd time..never..ever..EVER did i want to experience that kind of pain again..but there you go..no choice..my happily ever from my first loss s now gone too..l have been so bereft without him..how to go on?..so l am with you every step of the way…and isn’t changing things that don’t work called resilience? ..we can be brave together..

  3. Yes, Alison, I absolutely understand the grief and fear and confusion.
    You are so good at articulating that feeling of overwhelm. You will be okay.
    L xxoo

  4. I haven’t been following you for long..but I love your blog. You’re real and funny and inspiring ..and human. We all go through these days, you’re one of the few who’s willing to admit it in print. Thank you for bravely sharing..I hope tomorrow is a brighter day for you.

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