In My Own Little Bubble.

By alison March 8, 2006 65 Comments 2 Min Read

Bubble

Last night I read a book from start to finish.  Then  in the wee small hours I got up and wandered about the house, straightening this and tidying that.   I carried the cup that has sat on the bookself for the past three days, to the sink and washed it carefully. Then I went upstairs and tucked my son in and laid down next to Mark and waited for sleep that when it came filled my head with things that make me blush. Men long forgotten and brought starkly back to life by the power of painkillers prescribed by the emergency doctor.

I can’t hear anything. My son stands in front of me mouthing words I understand by telepathy. I watch television with subtitles and feel tired at the thought of  conversation. I cry in the night and ring my Mommy and ask her to make it stop. I get to know myself better in the nothingness.

But silence is surprisingly loud. The noise of sensation, of infection, of  eating and thinking, enough to drown out the proper senses.

I read a lot. Five big novels, one after the other. I lie with my head on a hot water bottle. Let  thin soup fall down my throat with having to swallow. Open my eyes to see Mark standing looking down at me with no warning of his coming home. Give up responsibility to anyone willing to take care of me.

I open and close my mouth, over and over like a fish.  Willing the explosion that will bring music back to my ears. I take too many painkillers, but feel like tearing my  ears right off when  I don’t.

I duck Marks hand’s, cupped to bring my head to his for a kiss.

It is an infection. Abcesses in both ears that have rendered me deaf, hysterical and strangely calm.

I’ll be back soon. When my thoughts aren’t carried away in soapy bubbles.

Other Things To Do At BrocanteHome

65 Comments

  1. Paola says:

    Oh poor poor you. I can't imagine not being able to hear and can't believe they can't do anything more. The only thing I can suggest is doing some steam inhalations (hide under a towel over a bowl of boiling water). I occasionally have terrible sinus problems and done frequently they do seem to clear out all ones' tubes so they might hasten the 'pop' along…
    Big hugs
    Paola

  2. Paola says:

    Oh poor poor you. I can't imagine not being able to hear and can't believe they can't do anything more. The only thing I can suggest is doing some steam inhalations (hide under a towel over a bowl of boiling water). I occasionally have terrible sinus problems and done frequently they do seem to clear out all ones' tubes so they might hasten the 'pop' along…
    Big hugs
    Paola

  3. persephone says:

    How terrible. I'm wishing you a speedy recovery!

  4. persephone says:

    How terrible. I'm wishing you a speedy recovery!

  5. Joanna says:

    Alison, please take care ,there nothing so painful as a ear infection! I will be thinking of you, wish I was closer to bring ,warm soup and make toast and tea.

  6. Joanna says:

    Alison, please take care ,there nothing so painful as a ear infection! I will be thinking of you, wish I was closer to bring ,warm soup and make toast and tea.

  7. Bessilu says:

    Oh feel better soon; I had a terrible fever last week from a throat infection and it makes you feel so strange and horrible to be slightly delerious. Take care!

  8. Bessilu says:

    Oh feel better soon; I had a terrible fever last week from a throat infection and it makes you feel so strange and horrible to be slightly delerious. Take care!

  9. happyapple says:

    Oh no, that sounds so painful … I wish you a speedy recovery.

  10. happyapple says:

    Oh no, that sounds so painful … I wish you a speedy recovery.

  11. Lorelei says:

    Oh Alison I feel for you…Our health is so important….Take your medications and take the time to rest.Get well soon. :0)

  12. Lorelei says:

    Oh Alison I feel for you…Our health is so important….Take your medications and take the time to rest.Get well soon. :0)

  13. Savannah says:

    I am thinking of you. Cozy down and wait for the beautiful sounds of health! We're all thinking of you.

  14. Savannah says:

    I am thinking of you. Cozy down and wait for the beautiful sounds of health! We're all thinking of you.

  15. Susana says:

    Gosh Alison, I am so sorry to hear of all the pain you're going through. I really feel for you. I will keep you in my prayers so that you may be able to cope with it in the meantime, and that it may all be over as quick as it came. I hope you feel better soon. It is quite awful being dreadfully sick. Not only do you feel yucky, but it hurts a lot too. Take care, Love, Susana

  16. Susana says:

    Gosh Alison, I am so sorry to hear of all the pain you're going through. I really feel for you. I will keep you in my prayers so that you may be able to cope with it in the meantime, and that it may all be over as quick as it came. I hope you feel better soon. It is quite awful being dreadfully sick. Not only do you feel yucky, but it hurts a lot too. Take care, Love, Susana

  17. Theresa says:

    Alison, I have a child with ear problems, 3 surgeries later he is deaf in his left ear. The pain is the worst ! I feel that for you now. I am sorry, please get well soon.

  18. Theresa says:

    Alison, I have a child with ear problems, 3 surgeries later he is deaf in his left ear. The pain is the worst ! I feel that for you now. I am sorry, please get well soon.

  19. June says:

    What a terrible time for you. I am so sorry you're ill and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery.

  20. June says:

    What a terrible time for you. I am so sorry you're ill and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery.

  21. Mindy says:

    dear Alison, so sorry to hear your feeling so poorly, sending you my well wihes for a speedy recovery, please rest and take care dear…praying for you..hugs to you xo

  22. Mindy says:

    dear Alison, so sorry to hear your feeling so poorly, sending you my well wihes for a speedy recovery, please rest and take care dear…praying for you..hugs to you xo

  23. sofia says:

    oh Alison !!! I want to wish you a happy woman day even if it's not that happy for you…hope you'll be back and recovered very, very soon. One big Kiss for you 🙂

  24. sofia says:

    oh Alison !!! I want to wish you a happy woman day even if it's not that happy for you…hope you'll be back and recovered very, very soon. One big Kiss for you 🙂

  25. julie says:

    So sorry, Alison….Thoughts and prayers….
    Love, Julie

  26. julie says:

    So sorry, Alison….Thoughts and prayers….
    Love, Julie

  27. ~Vicki says:

    Get Well wishes from everyone here! xox

  28. Andrea says:

    Alison~
    I hope you are feeling better soon. Sending warm wishes for a quick recovery. I know it's not easy being sick with a little one to take of!
    Warmest Regards,
    Andrea

  29. Andrea says:

    Alison~
    I hope you are feeling better soon. Sending warm wishes for a quick recovery. I know it's not easy being sick with a little one to take of!
    Warmest Regards,
    Andrea

  30. Gina C says:

    Oh, Alison, it sounds so terribly painful, and I hope it ends soon. I'm sorry you're going through this.

  31. Suzie says:

    I'm keeping you in my prayers Alison, and hoping you have a speedy recovery.
    Take care and much love to you…
    xxx

  32. Suzie says:

    I'm keeping you in my prayers Alison, and hoping you have a speedy recovery.
    Take care and much love to you…
    xxx

  33. ms*robyn says:

    I was wondering how you were, sweet Alison. You poor thing – you just rest up and heal – the body heals itself so well, when it is allowed to rest. xox

  34. ms*robyn says:

    I was wondering how you were, sweet Alison. You poor thing – you just rest up and heal – the body heals itself so well, when it is allowed to rest. xox

  35. kali says:

    You poor girl ~ it sounds so awful! Hope you start feeling better soon. Rest!, rest! and more rest! Now that's an order…

  36. Sandy says:

    We've been sick at my house, too. Hope you're out of that bubble soon!
    Happy healing.

  37. Sandy says:

    We've been sick at my house, too. Hope you're out of that bubble soon!
    Happy healing.

  38. Kristy says:

    You poor love.There's nothing worse than earache.I'll sat a little prayer tonight just for you.xxx

  39. Kristy says:

    You poor love.There's nothing worse than earache.I'll sat a little prayer tonight just for you.xxx

  40. Kristy says:

    I meant say not sat obviously!

  41. Sara says:

    Take care of yourself Alison. I've just gotten over a pair of ear infections myself, so I understand some of what you're going through.

  42. Sara says:

    Take care of yourself Alison. I've just gotten over a pair of ear infections myself, so I understand some of what you're going through.

  43. Maureen says:

    I hope someone is taking Finn off your hands while youre so ill. Its enough trying to cope with your pain let alone a toddler. Take Care Dear Alison….Get Well Soon Hugssssssssssss

  44. Maureen says:

    I hope someone is taking Finn off your hands while youre so ill. Its enough trying to cope with your pain let alone a toddler. Take Care Dear Alison….Get Well Soon Hugssssssssssss

  45. d.ann says:

    Just thought I would share this. I haven't had occasion to use this myself yet, but I have a friend who knows about all sorts of old fashioned remedies that can help make you more comfortable. She says that for an ear ache/infection pour rice into one of hubbys socks, tie in a knot, dampen the whole thing with water and place in the microwave to get hot. Lay down with this under your ear and it is supposed to help with the drainage. Not a cure, but maybe a few moments of comfort?

  46. d.ann says:

    Just thought I would share this. I haven't had occasion to use this myself yet, but I have a friend who knows about all sorts of old fashioned remedies that can help make you more comfortable. She says that for an ear ache/infection pour rice into one of hubbys socks, tie in a knot, dampen the whole thing with water and place in the microwave to get hot. Lay down with this under your ear and it is supposed to help with the drainage. Not a cure, but maybe a few moments of comfort?

  47. Joanne says:

    Praying that you may improve with each new day. Thank you for the delightful reading that you have given to each of your readers in the past, and now we can only say that we hope you:
    GET WELL SOON!
    Hugs and Love,

  48. Joanne says:

    Praying that you may improve with each new day. Thank you for the delightful reading that you have given to each of your readers in the past, and now we can only say that we hope you:
    GET WELL SOON!
    Hugs and Love,

  49. Leanne says:

    Rest, rest, and rest some more. We'll all be here when you feel better. We'll all be here while you are off getting better, too. We don't want to see another post until you get well — that's an order! We are all thinking of you and sending our thoughts and prayers. (and wishing we could do more for you!)

  50. Leanne says:

    Rest, rest, and rest some more. We'll all be here when you feel better. We'll all be here while you are off getting better, too. We don't want to see another post until you get well — that's an order! We are all thinking of you and sending our thoughts and prayers. (and wishing we could do more for you!)

  51. Eileen says:

    Hang in there, sweetie girl.

  52. Eileen says:

    Hang in there, sweetie girl.

  53. Kerry says:

    Oh dear Ali … so so sorry for you!
    Chin up honey bunch … it's quiet and you're allowed to hang around reading as much as you like (that's the bright side). Thinking of you.

  54. Kerry says:

    Oh dear Ali … so so sorry for you!
    Chin up honey bunch … it's quiet and you're allowed to hang around reading as much as you like (that's the bright side). Thinking of you.

  55. healing whispers sent!rest now!

  56. Nancy says:

    Get Well Soon, Sweet Ali! You are in my heart and thoughts and prayers as are Mark and little Finn. You take care of YOU first and foremost and let the men spoil you a bit.
    Huggles and health!
    Nancy

  57. Nancy says:

    Get Well Soon, Sweet Ali! You are in my heart and thoughts and prayers as are Mark and little Finn. You take care of YOU first and foremost and let the men spoil you a bit.
    Huggles and health!
    Nancy

  58. Petah Hatcher says:

    Alison, I went through the same thing myself last year and was in a bubble, so can totally sympathise. You just want to crawl into a hole. Wish I was closer to lend a hand, but I am sure you have lots of loved ones looking after you. Take care and take it from me, you will hear those birds sing again and it will be the most wonderful sound ever. Well maybe not as good as wonderful as hearing your baby's first cry. Petah

  59. Petah Hatcher says:

    Alison, I went through the same thing myself last year and was in a bubble, so can totally sympathise. You just want to crawl into a hole. Wish I was closer to lend a hand, but I am sure you have lots of loved ones looking after you. Take care and take it from me, you will hear those birds sing again and it will be the most wonderful sound ever. Well maybe not as good as wonderful as hearing your baby's first cry. Petah

  60. Danielle says:

    Oh I hope you get better soon Alison. It's sooo depressing being ill! We've all had a horrid virus for a fortnight, eugh! I wish you good health and hopefully a speedy recovery!

  61. Danielle says:

    Oh I hope you get better soon Alison. It's sooo depressing being ill! We've all had a horrid virus for a fortnight, eugh! I wish you good health and hopefully a speedy recovery!

  62. shell says:

    Aww, this sounds positively horrific! I hope that your ears heal soon and that you feel bright and cheery again soon. Until then, let others look after you!

  63. shell says:

    Aww, this sounds positively horrific! I hope that your ears heal soon and that you feel bright and cheery again soon. Until then, let others look after you!

  64. Julie, Adam's m says:

    Poor Ali. Hope you recover very soon. If you do use Marks sock, do make sure its been washed first. x x x ju

  65. Julie, Adam's m says:

    Poor Ali. Hope you recover very soon. If you do use Marks sock, do make sure its been washed first. x x x ju

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