Mavis and Sue.

By Alison November 11, 2006 13 Comments 3 Min Read


Oh it’s a funny old life. Two month’s after Mark left,  Kath’s  husband  packed up his little  suitcase and  disappeared  off into  the yonder  after him.

All of a sudden we were  single Mummies, and I went from feeling like the most deserted woman on the planet to   feeling like I had  a partner in crime on the verge of a big adventure… 

So ok it’s hardly an adventure and there have been far too many nights sat sobbing together over a bag of crisps we were passing off as a meal, but it has been, dare I say it, so much easier for knowing that there is a person on the end of the phone who feels exactly the same as I do in the middle of the night when the whole house seems colder than it used to be…

Hormones compromise our sanity. We take turns alternatively being strong and weeping all over our matching Laura Ashley rugs. We moan about the kids because we are their Mums and it is our perogative. We dream of January when they will toddle off to afternoon daycare on a daily basis while we get hyper on super strong coffee. And above all else we analyse every daft thing our ex partners say and declare ourselves well rid… 

Of course we are not the same. We have each handled the shock that is sudden desertion in our own way. Kath is dignified. Quietly and oh so justifiably disgusted with her husbands behavior. Given to cooking portions of food to leave on my doorstep, and tidying her wardrobe at two o’clock in the morning. I talk too much. Fall apart a bit. Tell the world everything I think and feel. Make friends with Mark and fall dramatically, stupid in love with someone else…

We hate Saturdays.  Saturdays are Daddy days and all of a sudden we are surplus to requirements. Not welcome on the weekly visits to the pictures, or the park, or indeed on the obligatory visits to McDonalds. So instead we entertain ourselves.

We eat vats of popcorn in the cinema watching bad films Kath must take responsibilty for. We trail around Marks and Spencers choosing organic banana’s and worrying about whether there will be any parma ham left on the shelves. We drink more coffee than is necessary and debate the merits of drinking red wine in the afternoons. We giggle. We moan. We cry. And sometimes like today we nearly fall into our shopping trolleys laughing.

We are Waitrose girls. But she makes me do bad things. And today doing bad things meant venturing into the hellhole that is Aldi (strange, cheap, European supermarket) and leaving our snobbery at the door. Getting excited about foriegn looking biscuits, and vanilla brioche. Talking ourselves into boxes of dodgy dark chocolates and buying terrible bottles of rioja because it is wrapped in gold net and therefore by  anyones standards, just about  as posh as Aldi will ever get. And then I went too far.   In a kind of curiously dippy moment I  stroked a pair of velour jimjams stacked rather winningly next to the oranges and dear Kath nearly marched me out of the shop. But not before I made her put a bag of prawns back. Cheap prawns could kill a person Missus! But nobody ever died of bad taste in pyjamas…

Then it was a quick dash through the rain to a snuggly pub with coal fires, a shared plate of antipasti, and some twinkly fairy lights that brought on a migraine that left Kath blind, and me in charge of her gigantic 4×4.  Oh it was hideous.  I drove through torrential rain in the darkest dark, while Kath kept her hands over her eyes and we both  sat hunched in the front of the car like a decrepid Thelma  and Louise, screaming laughing  and quite plainly scared stiff.

Now I am here.And she is fifteen doors down the road. The babba’s are in bed, and although on nights like tonight it feels as if the whole world is out having a good time, there is something super snuggly about eating bad chocolate with Casualty and a pile of magazine’s and knowing that within two minutes either of us could be at the others, baby in a sleeping bag and  parallel worlds colliding so we never have to feel alone.


  1. How Fun! Hanging out with a good friend or two can be so fun, especially when you need a good cry or laugh! Do me a favor and have a piece of chocolate and a little wine for me! My four boys have colds tonite and daddy's out serenading at some lovely wedding which will be featured on Style television soon! Have a good night! Susana

  2. Meredith says:

    I'm so glad you have each other lean on and understand. Have a cozy night.

  3. Cookie says:

    How lucky you are to have each other for support and fun. Enjoy !

  4. Kim says:

    I'm so glad that you have someone in a similar situation (though, that sounded like I was glad you had to go through it all, but I think you know what I mean :)…it really does help to have someone who *really* knows what its like.
    By the way, I'm a closet fan of Aldi…its true…

  5. annabelle says:

    I'm so glad to hear that you both have found a friend who understands whole heartedly the situations you guys are in. It’s so much better to go through it with someone than alone. And it sounds like you two are having some good fun. I kinda miss that. Having a good friend is very precious indeed. Have much deserved fun girls;and do tell of your shopping excursions.
    Annabelle ~^..^~ xo

  6. Dianntha says:

    What fun you have….how wonderful to live where there is so much adventure. Take advantage of it!!!! Be true to yourself and enjoy what life brings your way!

  7. Sheila says:

    I loved reading this. I was laughing along with the pair of you. You will survive Alison, this proves it. Have a great evening and don't drink all that wine…!

  8. Cindy says:

    Hi Alison and all!
    What are you like girls! : )
    I can find myself in many things you mention, often I thank God that because of Him I found true innner Peace and the deeper meaning and purpose of Life and what the 'role'of others and myself is, in it! I'm glad that you have good friends who are there for you, I have them too but my biggest Friend is the Lord…He never fails or leaves me, guides me through everything….knows exactly what I need etc. I pray that this will be for you aswell dear…Love and hugs, Cindy

  9. lizzie says:

    The Aldis in the UK are better than the US – better selection of veggies – I bought wonderful leeks there – I like the people in there – many are impoverished or on a tight budget – humble and respectable trying to stretch their food dollar, makes me think. Lots of little old ladies – I think the booze isnt bad – the Winking Owl merlot is good and the harvati cheese is OK. They also have bags of frozen mixed berries (not strawberries) which are great and
    inexpensive. Waitrose is great too – I got half price quails eggs there – we had them with salt and drinks.

  10. Claudette says:

    Aah…ALDI, the dusty place where produce goes to die. I went once , being an M&S manager, I had to sate my curiosity as to the netherworld of supermarkets. All I came out with was an itchy head. Arguments of snobbery, how other live etc. aside, a HUUUGE part of our store's demographic is the pensioner. They all must live by my mantra…"Quality NOT quantity." Glad you got youself a dancing partner and hope you have many evenings ahead of glugging vats of red. Just don't drive into the canyon with her!

  11. Gena King says:

    Its lovely that you have a friend to go on this journey with,but Alison…keep away from Aldi, its not big and its not clever, and the wine is like paint stripper.:)

  12. So much nicer when a road is travelled along with a friend.

  13. Verbina says:

    Oh don't be too harsh on Aldi. Yes it can and does sell some slightly scary items. However if you delve a little deeper they sell the most wonderful Antipasti, which I have to say beats Marks and Sparks hands down, on both price and quality. Their brioche is something special too!
    Be brave, go back again, you may be surprised.

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