I am a rubbish Mum. Really I am. I get so het up about making Finley’s life as perfect as possible, that sometimes I forget that all he really needs is a cuddle with his Mummy and a custard cream.
Yesterday I nearly lost him. I was all in a dither because the teeny little shepherds pie I had made for him tasted funny, and so while I tipped out a jar of Hipp Organic for his
Now you can always tell when Finley’s up to good because he shouts "Whats that?" at the top of his little voice. He had been shouting it for maybe a minute before it registered with me that he might be in danger and just as I swung around I saw him tip off the edge of the armchair and land on his head, his neck twisting at an awkward angle to his body and his right arm jamming underneath him.
Now this is a child who is accident prone. A little boy so confident, he has no fear. A little boy who falls over every five minutes then picks himself up and runs off. I screamed and he lay silent. I thought he was dead. I ran towards him and he looked up at me and suddenly started wailing at the top of his voice. By now I had convinced myself his neck was broken, and I was too scared to pick him up so I ran to the phone to call Mark and just as I got through Finley picked himself up and ran screeching towards me and we both sat on the dining room floor crying for a few minutes until Finley leaned forward and pinching my neck asked "Whats that?"
I don’t even know why I am telling you this. There is no moral to the tale.
I am a bad mother and that my friends is that.
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okay, i confess that i am saying this from the point of view of someone who has never been a mother, but i'm am almost certain that being a good mother does not require keeping your eyes trained on your child 24 hours a day. the truth is kids will explore, kids will do stuff, and the scary truth is that sometimes they will hurt themselves. but really, i am fiercely of the belief that you're not doing them any favours by protecting them with all your might and not letting them make any mistakes or have any accidents. first, that would make for a creepy overbearing mother. second, they wouldn't learn then, and odds are that you're going to die before them, so if you've sheltered them their whole life, when you're 103 and die, they're gonna be completely buggered.
what i'm trying to say is i'm pretty sure you're not a bad mum.
Oh, Alison, believe it or not, you will look back on this day, if you happen to remember it, with Finley and you will both share a giggle.
I raised three little girls and now have 7 grandbabies with 1 more on the way. Some of our best times together are the ones we spend sharing our memories from their childhood.
You are a good mommy. You were there for him when he needed you the most. After he fell.