On Blogging…

I am not a blogger…

Isn’t "blog" a horrible word? It just sounds ugly and I am so vain I can’t bear to think of myself doing anything so unlovely…

So it’s a good job my Mum says this is not a blog.

I don’t know what it is, but according to her it is not a blog and as such I am not allowed to do bloggy things, like bitch about people (the one time I even came close to bitching about somebody, My Mum rang me and made me take it down!! Blink and you probably missed it…), get myself fired like poor old Dooce (hard when you haven’t got a job!), moan too much (I am prone to a really good winge from time to time), drift off topic too often, or talk about my sex life(haven’t got one, am exhausted from all this vintage housekeeping)…

However I am obliged to post regularly (She rings me and tells me off if I haven’t posted anything for a day or two!), not waffle on too obscurely (She, like most of you, doesn’t get Alice and I just write it cos it makes me laugh!), not get too personal (big no-no…) and be nice about her….

But it’s hard. Not to be nice about my Mum(!), but to keep the ideas coming: to write something everyday that offers more than just random thoughts or observations, to write something that educates and expands my readers horizons and to try to resist the temptation to get to personal, which might work for some, but can occasionally drift into the inane or quite frankly, the deadly dull when I’m in charge…

I, like most bloggers, love comments, but I don’t live for them. Like many others I love tracking how people found the site and how I was googled in the first place (this week by a wierdo seaching for a dirty housewife , lots of Sharon Osbourne fans, somebody looking for the paintings from the Desperate Housewives set, and a man (it could only be a man, surely?) looking for a "houselady+ apron + suspenders + mop"…) and I am kind of obsessed with all the stats, some of the snazzier site counter sites can provide. I might not be running a blog, but I definitely suffer from the bloggers disease of self obsession…

So if it isn’t a blog in the "Here is the minutie of my life: make of it what you will" sense of the word, then what is it? It isn’t a diary, it isn’t a fantastical journal of my life as a private call girl and it isn’t a showpiece for my creativity, or a rant about anything in particular.

It is what it is and I hope, that for you, it is, exactly what it says it is: a way of life for homemakers everywhere…

Will that do Mum?